Sunday, January 22, 2012

Be Who You Are.

I think life would be infinitely easier if we could get just one little truth inside our thick skulls: It's not about us.

Do you know how many hours a day I spend thinking about myself? I've never kept a record, but I'm sure I'd be rather ashamed if I saw it. Even when I'm talking to God, so often my words focus right back on me: "God, I'm not strong enough. God, I'm not worthy. God, I'm afraid. God, I need You."

Not that those are bad things to say, in and of themselves. But we get stuck there, with ourselves at the center of the universe, and we are falling apart, so we surmise the whole universe must be falling apart too, the weight of the world is crushing our shoulders and if we make one wrong move, the whole planet will explode into a million pieces.

Which, of course, is not true. Not even close. Life isn't about us. Even "our" life isn't about us. We're just a tiny paragraph in a much bigger story. So what if we're not strong enough? So what if we mess up? So what if someone judges us? It's not about us. Not about our strengths, or failures, or reputations.But we get so caught up in our own little individual lives, forgetting that we are part of a body, part of something huge and glorious. And with that mentality, it truly is the end of the world when something goes wrong.

That is why there is such freedom when we realize that life isn't about us. It means we can fall, because God will catch us every time. It means that things can go wrong, because God has a bigger plan. It means we can suffer, because God will turn it into something beautiful. It means we don't have to be strong, because we have a God who fights for us. It means we don't have to have everything figured out, because God knows what He's doing. It means we can rest, because our shoulders were never meant to carry the world.

We are so afraid to let go of our selfishness. So afraid of losing ourselves. But that's the trick, isn't it? We think we are losing ourselves, when we say "Take it all, God. My whole self. Use me for Your purposes." Until we actually reach that place of surrender, and suddenly we discover that for the first time, we can truly live as we were created to live; we can finally be who we are.

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