this body You gave,
why, oh Potter?
Screaming hatred at the malformed clay that cages my soul - screaming hatred at me - screaming hatred at You. Screaming
how long, how long, how long
I want to (oh God, I don't want to)
wallow in
my infantile selfishness,
my petulant greed,
my suffocating shame
my
I want to (oh God, I don't want to)
close my eyes against the tides
that always
pull me back
to the starting line
and (let me (please don't let me))
drown.
I had a dream
I spent everything I had, kicking out against thick waters. So close
to safety, my fingers clutching the dock's splintered edge. But
my arms were far too weak to carry my own weight. And
a creature, dark and hungry, was swimming up from the depths.
...
[Epilogue]
? ? later
...
[Epilogue]
? ? later
When the morning came,
it came with sunlight
weeping mercy.
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